The other night I woke up from a nightmare, I sat up and began to think of different things to calm myself self down. But instead I thought of this.
My thoughts took me to my early childhood; I was probably only five or six. My brother and I were watching our neighbor mistreat his dog, this dog was skinny and abused. We felt sorry for it and when the master wasn’t around we would give the poor Beast some water.
Needless to say, that dog never wagged his tail when the master was near. I think that dog was more intelligent than some humans. No, don’t get offended just yet. This dog knew his master was harmful and mean. So why can’t some humans have that intuition about some of the things in their lives? “What are you getting at?” You ask, well, I guess I am thinking about how some of us humans develop strange behaviors towards things that are harmful to us.
I’m talking about eating disorders in particular, although the examples are nearly infinite. We have long known the term “Stockholm syndrome” it 1st became known during a bank robbery in Stockholm, Sweden. There were four hostages held in the pit of a Bank Safe, and before the ordeal came to an end, the hostages were sympathetic to their captors.
Why? Well from research, the conclusion is, this forms out of a false sense of security and care. The victim was shown the threat of death, then the captors gave the promise to spare them. When being face to face with death, then to have that taken away, this makes one exceedingly joyful and thankful. Thus giving that false sense of security. Now in the correlation between Stockholm syndrome and eating disorders. Many eating disorders are formed during stressful or traumatic events, the eating disorder becomes a coping skill to deal with the situation one is struggling with.
It becomes a security blanket, or rather, a false sense of security. We become thankful for its company, It becomes the thing that is always there for us. But not unlike those people in Stockholm, Sweden, We have become willing hostages of our eating disorder. We forget the harm it is doing and only see the comfort we Think it gives us. We Soon become so Enmeshed with our deadly foe, that we begin to turn on those who try to help us for real.
We lie and act out in anger when our captor gets threatened by the chance of being unmasked or by recovery, we hold on tight and listen to its every demand. We do not see that we are being held at gunpoint in the pit of a bank safe (aka Our minds), forced to obey its every need. We turn a deaf ear to the cries of those raiding that bank, trying to get us out, they first negotiate with the captor, the captor is relentless; demanding it has our best intentions at heart, that we are fine.
It’s not until by the grace of God, we are given a glance at our captors’ real side, whether it came from an intervention from loved ones, or a medical scare, or However God shows Us this deadly Foe, we see and its twisted and distorted figure suddenly becomes so real, that we even notice the chains that bind us, we then hear the voices of those calling out to us, begging us to fight our way out, the captor turns its ugly eyes towards us.
It understands we have seen the truth of our situation, this thing is no longer formed as a friend, but rather it is now the very face of death in our eyes, we know we must fight to get out of that bank safe, to turn away from the will of the Captor, We reach out a hand, desperate for one of our loved ones outside that bank to grab us and pull us out, a hand does latch on, it is Gods hand, leading us in the way we should go, giving us the strength to endure our temptations and to gladly do what he commands.
We are handed by God to those who love us, they forgive us for turning our back to them, they give us food and drink, a house or home, Family, and all the things to support this body in life, all the things, our captor in that bank safe was keeping us from, it was hiding us too deep in ourselves that the light of the word, which is Christ, was dimmed, but, Thanks, Be to God, in His Mercy and Love for us, He shone brighter and blinded that Captor, He pulled us away from its tight bondage and gave us a key to freedom through His Son Jesus.
The Captor leaves the vault now, desperate to find us and tie us up again, we pass it in our daily vocations, we catch a glimpse of its familiar face from time to time and sometimes we yearn for the false security it offered, this world is not a liar, if it’s hard, it will feel hard, if it’s stressful, it will be stressful, we think at least with the Captor, we could paint our feelings of these matters, we could turn inward to that part of ourselves that stopped feeling, or caring.
But this is when we must remember how it was to be given the gift of rebirth in our road to recovery, the gift that God gave us as He places us in the care of those who love us, and who deal with the stress and hard days alongside us. With the Captor, Anorexia, We were alone, faking our peace and comfort, but when we let it go back to the hole it crawled out of, we see even if it’s hard and scary, we are never alone.
From our many friends, our support system, to God Himself, we are so bountifully and graciously blessed, it no longer seems like a fantasy to go back to that Bank safe, it seems now, like something to fight, to flee from, to run to our Heavenly Father for rest, and to No longer Back Our Adversary.
Give us the strength Dear Heavenly Father to continue fighting our Old Adam, Forgive us when we stumble and in Your Mercy Grant that we rise anew in You and in the forgiveness of our sins. Grant us peace of mind and a calm spirit, help and defend us in all trials, show yourself a very present help in our hour of need. Grant us the strength to endure our temptations, and on the last day, to be victorious against the Evil One, by the Grace and Mercy of Your Son Jesus Christ, Who died for all sinners, that we may not die but have eternal life in You. Through Jesus Christ Our Lord, Amen +